Thanksgiving. Goddamn motherfucking Thanksgiving. Me and my constant need for attention really screwed things up for us on Thanksgiving. Or excuse me, Friendsgiving. We were at Mimsy’s house… with his girlfriend present… and surrounded by our closest friends and classmates. We threw a Friendsgiving to unite the cohort together, and since Mimsy was the only one with a real house? Naturally he hosted. The party was a wild success. Everyone ate, drank, and was definitely merry. We all enjoyed the company of others, and we drank heavily. Me and Mimsy always drank heavily, as we were the only ones that could rival each others drinking habits. Cut to the night ending, and the party dying down. Eventually everyone went home, but I stayed behind to help cleanup. I was the Events Coordinator, so naturally I had to stay the entire time. That was the excuse I gave myself.
At that point we were both drunk, and Mimsy’s girlfriend had passed out in their room. Keep in mind that I liked his girlfriend… somewhat. She wasn’t my favorite, but I held no ill-will towards this person. She never bothered me, and as far as I could tell she loved him. Maybe not for who or what he was, but there was some type of love/obsession there.
Mimsy and I were cleaning up in the kitchen while taking more shots and just talking. I was talking about how I still missed Butthead, that I was lonely and that I missed kissing. I’m pretty sure I asked for his advice on dating at that point, but what happened next left me shaking in my little boots. He turned around quickly to face me. He moved towards me, closing the gap between us. He had this mischievous grin on his face, and I was slow to figure out why. He leaned over, tilted my chin up while I was still talking, and kissed me. It was a hard kiss, definitely a drunken one. But it had intent, and it had a purpose. It also had meaning behind it. What that meaning was, I’ll probably never know. I’m sure it will continue to haunt me for the rest of my natural born life.
With just a slight moment of hesitation, I knew what I wanted to do. I bit his stupid mouth pretty damn hard. Was I enjoying the kiss? You’re damn right I was. But nobody interrupts me when I’m talking, so he needed to be taught a lesson. So I bit, and I bit with force. He stopped kissing me and laughed pretty hard. We kissed again, and I bit him once more. Just a baby bite this time, nothing major. We both laughed, I mentioned the tiny detail of his girlfriend sleeping in the other room, and we straightened everything up. I left for my house, and what had just happened replayed in my head until I passed out at home. My spiral downward was a slow and exhausting journey over the course of the next six months. Strap in kids, it gets ugly.